I am reading a novel, Time and Again by Jack Finney, where a guy goes back into time to 1882. I have always thought that would be the time I would like to live. It is discussed in the book how from day-to-day things change so minutely that most often we notice no change at all. We are able to slide through our days without feeling the “ping” or “pang” of change. But then when we look back over a year or two or ten, we can see that a building was erected or illness set in somewhere, or a baby that wasn’t born a year ago is now 1.
The bigger the change the bigger the ping. 9/11 was the biggest change we have seen in our life thus far. In one day, all of our lives changed and we could feel the pang throughout our bodies and souls. Really physically.
Change is SO painful for we folks.
Since we moved here to this paradise, change happens often and fast. One day here. Tomorrow gone.
Last week we had a dog named Simon and a goat named Ruthie. Today, we do not. (Yes, we had to put down our beloved Simon and Ruthie went to live with some wonderful people who needed a companion for their goat baby.) Last week we had 6 guineas running around town. Today, we have one of them sitting on 7 eggs in the brush thinking they will hatch. Not sure, but I think most birds lay on their eggs out in nature in the Spring. Its only been 32 degrees in the morning this week. I will be VERY surprised if these things hatch.
In two weeks we anticipate Black Friday which the resident turkey and buck will take leave. The two thorns in everyone’s side. Ping. Pang.
Everyday we see a different landscape around here in terms of what is moving about on the farm and, of course, the “real” landscape in nature. Way more noticeable than when we lived in the suburbs. I am outside bearing witness 80 percent of the time as opposed to 20 percent of the time.
Today I feel it. And I do feel it. Every time something changes around here I feel this ping like sound or feeling, like a flip of a finger onto a metal disc inside my heart.
Pops said a couple of months ago, “Man, things move and change around here fast. Nothing is ever the same.” Moving baby chicks to new homes. Moving goats to new stalls. Letting certain animals go. Farm management.
Every time I say we live on a “farm”, I have to giggle. That word should be reserved for those people who work harder than anyone I know. Those people who suffered greatly this year because of the drought and whose livelihood will be greatly affected. We are just pretending here. I wonder what farm means in the dictionary.
an area of land and its buildings used for growing crops and rearing animals, typically under the control of one owner or manager.
• the main dwelling place on such a site; a farmhouse : a half-timbered farm.
• [with adj. ] a place for breeding a particular type of animal or producing a specified crop : a fish farm.
• [with adj. ] an establishment at which something is produced or processed : an energy farm.
Ok, maybe I CAN call it a farm. We have a main dwelling on a such site.
Back to my thought…IS CHANGE GOOD?
Many people don’t want to be the victims of change. They want the stability and quiet and status quo. I like stability and quiet. But can stability and quiet sometimes translate into being stagnant? Are we challenging ourselves when we desire no change? Are we growing? CAN we grow without change?
I have grown a lot in the past couple of years with this change that we have made. But it has been hard and painful. And I have learned a ton through the trial and error of this whole thing. Walking into the unknown. Willing to take a risk. Somethings have worked and somethings haven’t.
I don’t want to walk out my door asking for my world to change in a dramatic way, but I want to open my self up daily to new experiences that somehow result in change/growth. That change being Karen growing in someway. Learning. Understanding. Feeling emotions. Pinging. Panging.
The cause of change is not always good or pleasant. LIke 9/11. Or the death of a loved one. But in all cases of change, we can learn and try to understand new things and it can ALWAYS bring us into a closer relationship with God.
I learned this AWESOME prayer a while ago……
Set Aside Prayer
Lord, help me to set aside what I think I know,
so that I may open myself to a new experience.
I like that. I have SO much to learn. And really, those of us who think we know it all, will never experience change, right?
I like change. Change is good.