Category Archives: Spiritual

March 13, 2013 · 10:39

Helloooo…

I went missing in action for a while.   I think I was overcome by smoke from the sugar shack.  Truly.   That whole thing was an experience that will probably be repeated (again and again).   It is just SO good.   Much like having a baby.  We forget the pain involved when it’s all over and we actually want to have another after the pain and agony of delivery.   It is very time-consuming and I’m not sure my physical health can withstand standing next to a wood fire for 10 hours at a time.  I have not felt great the last week and am quite positive the boiling had something to do with it.   The second day I had to resort to using a respirator.  We boiled for 7 days and got 30 or so bottles.

-2

We have some design issues  to contend with this year in planning for next year.   Note the canopy that is trashed on the side in photo.  I purchased the thing two weeks ago to save me and the fire from rain and two inches of snow destroyed it.   ugh.

Life can get a bit messy, cant it?

Which brings me to what is going on in my little pea brain.

We all have to make REALLY HARD decisions some times.  I have a friend who is in that process right now.   Sometimes our decisions make messes of our lives.  And other times, the decisions we make clean up those messes.  The rest of the decisions usually fall somewhere in the middle where we have to feel them and ride them and grow with and by them.

And as we stand by  others as they contemplate decisions,  we  want to  input and many times try to control their decision.

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.   Please, help me accept other’s decisions.

How do we come to the decisions we make?  I’m not talking about what to have for dinner.  I’m talking about the biggies.  The ones that form us into who we are and who we have to live with.

Barnes and Noble is stocked full of books on how to’s and self-help.  I have spent years with my nose in books trying to get someONE or someTHING to give me a clue as to who I am supposed to be morally.

Do we know right from wrong innately?  Do we need to be taught right from wrong?

Who do we depend on to give us a moral guideline for right and wrong?  Our parents?  Our political officers?

Do we CARE what is right or wrong?  Do we make decisions in the wind and let them fly where they may?  Let someone else pick up the pieces?

Seriously, folks.  I am asking.  What are we doin’ here?

As I  navigate these questions that burn holes in my heart,  I am inclined to believe that …….do any of us know how to be right and wrong on our own?   Where can we go to check our moral decisions?  How can we be sure that what we are choosing to do, does not hurt ourselves and others?  Does it matter?

Somewhere,  there is a definitive guide to moral judgement.  Wisdom.  God, give. it. to. me. .

Prayer.  Grace.

Since I quit drinking, and began to really delve into these questions,  I have often said that Barnes and Noble can lay one book on the curb and shut their doors.  100 percent of the answers lie in one book.   The Bible.   The day that I decided that I cannot trust  the decisions that I make and I cannot trust the word of others and that the  moral compasses of all of us are spinning round and round wildly, was the day I decided that ANY decision that I make,  I will confer with my “self-help” Book first.   It is consistent, reliable, true and predictable.  I do not have to question the validity.  EVER.  And for that I am more grateful than I can tell you.

Very,  very sorry for my heavy today.  My heart is heavy.  Heavy.   If you are so inclined to pray, please pray for my friend today.

God bless,

Karen

1 Comment

Filed under Farm, Spiritual, Uncategorized

Tagged as , , , , , , ,

February 12, 2013 · 11:42

Ya Wanna Help Me Get Ready For A Partay?

What do you think about when it is time to prepare for a party?  Lists. Lists. And more lists, where I am concerned.  The bigger the party, the more daunting.  Don’t you wish we could enjoy that process as much as we are supposed to enjoy the actual “partay”?  It is just plain hard work.    We have to take time out of our already busy schedules to get ‘er done.  It ain’t easy.  But what is?

DSCN0302.JPG

DSCN0321

DSCN0330

The day that  I was born, I don’t remember hearing, or any other day for that matter,  that life is easy.  Have you?  Has there ever been a time when your parents, teachers, siblings, etc said to you, “Sit back and relax, Sugar, for you are on a journey of  cinch. ” Piece of cake.  A breeze.

Why, then, is it so punishing for us to get our arms wrapped around life when it gets difficult? Which,  for me,  is every day.

I’m guessing 99 percent of our resentments stem from life not throwing us the easy life line that we desperately deserve.  (I just looked up “easy” in the thesaurus and it gave me “sluttish”   Oh my goodness.  Is that a word in our Webster?)

Could this life be a preparation for something else to come?  Really.  When you think about it, what are we doing all this for?  Look at the steps we take in planning a party.  It’s like a miniature look at our bigger picture life.  Getting supplies.  Making lists.  Working with others to get ‘er done.  Cleaning.   Communicating.   Teaching each other what we know so that we can be on the same page.  Ultimately,  it is an effort to get to a place where we can enjoy each other’s company.  Like when we get home from work at the end of a long day.

Tomorrow, Lent begins.  Lent is a time for the preparation of  what?  For Christians, it is a time to walk through 40 days with Christ as He prepares to die for our sins three days before Easter.   It is a time for us to see that life IS NOT easy,  as He so plainly shows us and that sacrifices are made.     So how do we move through that walk with Him?  We are asked to give up something that we enjoy so that we may feel, somehow, empathy for what He did.   Not sure if by me not eating candy, I will get a sense of His torture on the cross.   But, in our own little way, we want to suffer with Him.   I am here to tell you, it is HARD to give up something you love.

DSCN8128

Also, we are encouraged to pray with Him.  That is a sacrifice of time.  It is HARD to give that time.  We are also encouraged to give to charity.  It is HARD to give up that money that could otherwise be spent on moi.  It’s not easy.

Oh, but who told me it was easy?  I keep trying to track that source down.   I want want want easy.  The only thing that is really easy in my life is when I get to take a nap.   I asked Pops last year, what would he do on a Saturday afternoon if he could do whatever he wanted.  He said play golf.   My response was, “Have fun.  Cause I’m taking a nap.”  Number 1 thing on my easy list.

Lent is  like a preparation for a party.  The party being the risen Christ who died for our sins.  Thank God.  I would hate to have to account for all of my ghastly sins.  ugh.

Life is like a preparation for a party.  The party being the day that I get to go live with my Savior who partied with me every Easter of my life.   Every day of my life for that matter.

I would hate to spend my life preparing for a party that never happens.  Let me get the hard stuff done so I can get on with it.

God bless,

Karen

Leave a comment

Filed under Spiritual

Tagged as , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

February 6, 2013 · 12:40

Pagans. Water. Sacrifice.

DSCN0385

The original meaning of “pagan”  is country dweller.  When city folk made their way into the country with their Christian views, some country dwellers didn’t take too readily.  The definition evolved into:  country dwellers who were not Christians.  Today, I dont hear “country dwellers” when referring to pagans.

We traveled to Cleveland last week to see my son in a performance.  It was about a beautiful lake that had dried up.  Scientists were trying figure out how to make water to fill it back up.  Meanwhile, the “water spirits” were devastated that the water was gone as were the lake visitors.  It was a beautiful collaboration of artists of all mediums from my son’s college.  Dancers, musicians, visual artists, technical artists, etc.

Just love this graphic.

Just love this graphic.

When it was over, I heard the people  behind us talking about pagans and then Pops mentioned that they used pagan rituals in the performance.  It went totally over my head.  I am very ignorant when it comes to paganism.  I wouldn’t see it if it came up and kissed me on my cheek.  Mainly cause I don’t know what they are.  And it seems to me not appropriate to call someone a name that is not a Christian.  For me, they are simply people who do not share Christian beliefs.  The word “pagan” sounds derogatory to me.

What I took away from the play is how important our water is to us.  It is a necessity.  It feeds us.  It cleanses us.  It is a thing of beauty.  It heals us.  It entertains us.  It feels good against our bodies.  It is powerful.   It touches each of our senses.  Gosh.  Really something, isn’t?  It is the essential element for life.  Thank you, God, for giving us a beautiful gift.

In the play, they  sacrificed a couple of  people (I think.  Like I said, it went totally over my head.  This is what I was told. I was busy gathering my own interpretation that had nothing to do with human sacrificing) to bring the water back.

There was a quote  that I was struck by.  “Nothing can be gained from a solitary sacrifice from one who always cared.”

 (A great exception to that is  the solitary sacrifice of Jesus Christ dying on the cross to save us from our wretched sins.  Much has been gained from that.) 

I interpreted the quote to mean:  That if I care about something very much, it will not be a sacrifice for me to  continue to care.   If I have not cared too deeply for something then, to begin caring, it will be a sacrifice.  A simple “water” example for this is that if I have always cared about the conservation of water,  to use less water in showering, brushing my teeth, washing dishes and watering the lawn will not be a great deal.  But if I haven’t cared, then making those changes would be a sacrifice.

AND  in this case,  we must collectively sacrifice to make a difference.

Aside from the fact we all need water, we all love water, don’t we?   I know I love to see water running through our creeks and rivers.  Big waves crashing on our beaches.  In order to preserve what we love,  don’t we collectively have to make sacrifices for that precious element?

IMG_0802

IMG_0287

IMG_1848

DSCN0526

DSCN0423

IMG_0784

IMG_4208

DSCN9479

DSCN9499

It is a critical issue.  Are we  taking measures to protect our water for our children and their children.  Sacrifice IS the answer.

God bless, you people.  I love you.

Karen

Leave a comment

Filed under Farm, Health/ Nutrition, Spiritual

Tagged as , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

January 29, 2013 · 19:15

Here. This Moment.

We are a culture that is on the search always.  For happiness and joy.  We look forward to going. Going. Going.   Not so much now as in the past, I longed to go on vacation. Where can we go that is going to give us that ultimate rush? That ultimate breathtaking view that is going to send me swooning.  For some it is the beach.

DSCN9461

For some of us, it’s the mountains.

DSCN8906

For some of us, it is cruising on the Caribbean.  And for others, it is riding the roller coaster at Cedar Point.   Regardless of what trips our  trigger, we are in search of the next thing that is going to trigger the quintessential experience.

Some people have “bucket lists”.  The list of places and events that will make  our personal world all the better.

All of these things are wonderful things to experience.  But, if we can not find joy and happiness in the sullied days of our lives, then those beautiful sites will not doing anything for us either.

Temporal is not going to cut it for me.  It is short-lived and disappointing.  Been there.  The reality does not match up to the expectation.  Or returning to reality is a disappointment.  I want everlasting, ever-lovin’ joy.

I am learning that it is impossible to stay in the moment while I am looking forward.  One question I ask myself while I am highly anticipating that moment that  will take my breath away:  What is going to happen to me at that  moment that is not happening to me right now?  How is seeing or doing that “thing”  going to make me a happier person?  It might give me a thrill for a minute but I still  have to walk away with that same person that took me there.  ME.

Our daily life can be blessed with joy and happiness if we can just sit  in it and see the beauty around us.  The ordinary.

Our ordinary is such a miracle by itself that it DOES compare to the majestic beauty of a snow-capped mountain.

-40

DSCN0189

Our animals take such pleasure in just living and taking in all that abounds.   Can I do that?  Can I see the beauty in washing the dishes?  Pops does it most of the time.  I SEE the beauty in that.   Cooking dinner?  Making beds?  I love what a room likes when the bed is made.  Sometimes I will make the bed to get in it.   Can these things compare to a Hawaiian beach?

When I choose to see God in the ordinary, (which is exactly where He is with us),  joy can be found.   Since the day that I decided to look for Him in my ordinary, I found Him, and joy was the gift that He gave me.   As long as I know where to find Him, I find I really don’t have to take a joy ride anywhere.   We have a wonderful friend who had a very spiritual heart who passed away several years ago.  Always, he would say, “I got all I need right here.”  He was magnificently content even through his terminal illness.   “I got all I need right here.”  He would pat his heart softly.   The man got it.

Author, Ann Voskamp writes, “The only place we need see before we die is this place of seeing God, here and now. ”

I say Amen to that.  That place is spectacular.

Happy travels.

God bless,

Karen

Leave a comment

Filed under Spiritual

Tagged as , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

January 24, 2013 · 12:44

A Lesson From Someone Who Has Been There

Take in this scenario and try to imagine your feet standing in these shoes:

You are born by two parents who have no qualms about telling you they don’t want you.  They neglect and take advantage of you by getting you drunk and high by the age of 7.  They are never there to tend to your needs at home.  They use you as a ticket to get in places they do not belong.  You develop drug and alcohol dependency by the age of 12 and enter into rehab twice by the time you are 14.

Enough?

This is the life of Drew Barrymore.  I saw an interview last night that I am still thinking about.   I have always known who she is but have not really given her a second thought.   What I know of her is that she might be a little flighty,   is nice enough and has had some hard knocks.   For those of you who do not know who she is, she became famous in the movie ET in the 80’s.

drew_barrymore_in_et-t2

Photo from interview

Photo from interview

Seems normal enough. huh?  Is going to court at the age of 15 to get “emancipated” from your parents normal?   The courts granted that freedom.  She no longer had to be the daughter of these people.  She always knew from day one that it was she that was going to have to care for herself.  That is tough business.

Whew.

What I am so bowled over by, is what she did with that history of abuse and neglect.   Most of us are not too different from she.  While I never was taken to Studio 54 at age 7 as a ticket to get my mom in, I was left at Glendale shopping center for 3 hours after my mom said she would pick my up.  I was 20 years old when that occurred.  She just forgot me.  Oh, and my Mom and Dad went to New York during my 10th Birthday.  Ugh.

But seriously, we  all have wounds. Wounds. Wounds.  Some of us are aware of them.  Some of us choose not to be.  But those wounds mold us if we allow them to.   It makes us who we are.   Or aren’t.

If  I allow myself to live with the wounds, then I become one, some or all of the following:  sad, lonely, self-loathing, cynical, brash, angry, fearful of many things, isolated, depressed,  self loathing,  cheated, slighted, etc.   It WILL take shape  because we have been hurt and we will protect ourselves at all costs.

If I choose to face my wounds, I can be free of all that.    How do I do that?  In most cases, mine included, it usually involves outside help.  An objective perspective.   It often takes the help of an outsider to help us even recognize the wounds.  They are sometimes so ingrained and part of our fiber that we think that it is normal.   Something is wrong if we are the things mentioned above on a regular basis.  Of course it takes heavy-duty strength to move our pride aside to admit that we are  any one  of those things.  Cynical. Who moi?  No way.  It is a process whereby we admit.  Then accept.  Then take action.

Drew Barrymore, I am sure, has had her share of outside help.  She chooses to not go that route of being emotionally tortured inside.   She chooses freedom.  YEAH.  I heartily applaud her.

She has admitted  the problem.  She accepted that problem.  Now she is  choosing not to spend her life blaming and finger-pointing and being angry.   She is taking action to choose a life rich and happy.  She just first had to come to grips and understand how she got to the place she is and then moves on to a road of freedom.

WE HAVE THE POWER.  To live life joyfully.  WE HAVE THE POWER.  To change ourselves.  NOBODY CAN MAKE US BE THE WAY WE ARE.   

We have the power.

You have the power.

Oh, and by the way, God plays a major part in healing.  Just ask Him.  In this case, He’ll say,”Yep, she’s right on this one.”

Sunny days ahead.

DSCN0686

God bless,

Karen

1 Comment

Filed under Spiritual

Tagged as , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

January 13, 2013 · 17:00

We The People.

Over and over, in the past few weeks, I have either been a  part of  conversations about community or an eaves dropper of a conversation.

When I was little, in my head, I thought a community was a church basement filled with women in skirts, and children running around.  Asbestos tiled floors.  Fluorescent lighting.  I don’t see the men in my mind. I am fairly confident they were around.  A buffet displayed by the people.  Foil covered dishes filled with different homemade casseroles and delectables.

I was always on the outside looking in.  Always.  Always.  We, as a family, didn’t participate in many events like this.  In fact, I don’t remember  attending a single event with my family that included the near by community.

images

I did not participate in sports when I was little or bigger.  I did not experience community there.  Maybe I was locked in a closet then, but I didn’t know they really existed.  Kickball.  I remember that.  If you are older than 50 and female….  Did you play a sport?

Anywhoooo.  I am thinkin’ community is important.  I’m guessing that community might be an integral part in the success of this whole plan.   Are we suppose to lean on, share, draw from one another?  Use each other?  Learn from each other?  Heal each other?  Have fun with each other? Come together for common causes?

For most of my life I have not understood.  It is becoming clear.  God has a serious plan and it is not just about He and I.  Even though, I would really like that.  I like my little thing I got goin’ with Him.  I forget that the people to the left and the right of me are His also.  He loves them too.  Oh I get it.  I am supposed to include them too.  Ah.  Darn.  Really?  How ’bout the guy who believes the opposite of me.  Him too, huh?  Huh.    And the gal down the way there, that looks at me like I’m nuts?  Her too?  Hmmm.

I am by nature and/or experience somewhat of a loner.   I  think it is a combination of liking solitude, and lacking  experience in community.    It never ceases to amaze me how much our little childhood experiences fiercely affect our adult lives.

So, what am I learning about community now that I am more aware of them and my part(or lack there of)?  I am learning that I want to be a part .

I am learning that the members have to be actively participating in the community using care, kindness and patience in order for it to be a healthy, vibrant group.

It is extremely easy for me to withdraw from this desire.  Because I don’t know how.   But I am trying to put my left foot in.  Next, I will put my right foot in.  Next thing you know, I’ll be shaking all about.

Then helllooooo,  Community.

Karen has arrived.

Someday.

You sure I can’t just join the community of chickens?  I love their conversation.  They make me laugh out loud.  I have to remind myself that people make me laugh too. And that I like being with them.

Chicken Community

Chicken Community

Or the doggie community?

IMG_0262

I can snarf around with the best of them.

I love people.  I am just afraid.

P.S.  I penned this post last night.  This morning we attended Mass in our  little church in our cute little village.  Fr. Eric, our priest, was giving his last Mass at our church as he moves on to a new parish elsewhere.  The sermon was about community.   He cried through the homily.  We all cried.  It was profoundly moving.  Our tears tasted of love, togetherness and community.

God bless,

Karen

2 Comments

Filed under Spiritual

Tagged as , , , , , , ,

January 9, 2013 · 05:00

A Hoosier Salute

My son attended a high school that was born in 2004.  Blessed Theodore Guerin High School.  Two years after it opened, Blessed Theodore Guerin was canonized a saint in Rome at St. Peter’s Basilica thus changing it to St. Theodore Guerin High School.  Many students, parents, and staff went to Rome to celebrate that miracle.  Two students had the privilege of processing in with Pope Benedict, one carrying his staff.  The chance for any of us to participate in the canonization of a saint, or to be closely connected to one becoming a saint is about ten million to one or more.

Mother_Guerin_Icon

Theodore Guerin was born in 1798 in France.  In 1839, years after she had entered the religious life, she was summoned to the United States to form a community that educated, provide religious instruction and assist the ailing.  She was excited and willing.  She made the journey over the pond with five of her Sister compadres.

They found themselves dumped into a dense forest outside of Terre Haute, Indiana with desolation abounding for miles.  I am thinkin’ that is not what they had envisioned.   They persevered.  I love that.  I would have gone home.  Without going into details, St. Mary of the Woods college was born and today is a sacred place for the education of women .

stmarytoday

My good friend  who graced me with her presence (waving her stunning St. Mary of the Woods ring around me as usual) over the holidays brought me the 2013  St. Mary of the Woods Calendar with wonderful quotes from Theodore giving  her impression of Indiana in those early days of , what I would think, tremendous challenge.  By the way, I want to take online courses so that I, too,  one day  can wear one of those rings.   So cool.  There is something about this place, that I have never visited, that calls out to me.  I know that there is a big part of me that would like to be a nun and I know they have them there.  And then there is the ring,  of course.  And my dear friend who I look up to because she had the privilege of going to St. Mary of the Woods.   And my son went to  St. Theodore Guerin which was probably the most incredible experience that our family encountered.   And she, herself,  says that any one of us could be a saint.  I know that is a little lofty of me to think I can  be one.  But, it would be pretty cool, wouldn’t you say?   I want to be touched by this woman.

So, what did she say, back then,  about our Hoosierland?

She said:

“The beauty of the forests of Indiana in the rich and lovely month of May surpasses all description.  The rivers, swollen by the rains, flow through long lanes of verdure, caressing the islands they seem to carry with them in their course and which look like floating nosegays.  The trees raise their straight trunks to the height of more than a hundred and twenty feet and are crowned with tops of admirable beauty.  The magnolia, the dogwood, the catalpa covered with white flowers, the perfumed snow of the springtime, intermingle with the delicate green of the other trees.”

Uh, yes.  This still exists.

“….each excursion we discover something marvelous, beautiful, and useful..At each step we can admire the grandeur, the power, the goodness of God…..I love our woods and solitude very much.”

Amen to that.

She says, ” We have much to suffer from the climate.  It is so changeable that in one day we sometimes experience extremes both of heat and cold.  For three or four weeks the heat has been suffocating….When there is no breeze at all, one can scarcely breathe. …..At St. Mary’s it has rained only once since the last days of April (written in July)…..It is surprising that the trees, and even the corn, etc.  remain fresh looking in such a drought.  This is owing, unquestionably to the heavy dew which falls every night. ”

Sound familiar?

“This land was no longer for me the land of exile; it was the portion of my inheritance, and in it I hope to dwell all the days of my life.”

Yeah, me too.

and

“What have we to do in order to be saints?  Nothing extraordinary; nothing more than what we do every day.  Only do it for his love.

My goal.  Lofty.  Unattainable.  Nonetheless.

St. Karen. You likey?

St. Karen.  Attractive, ain’t she?

God bless,

Karen

Leave a comment

Filed under Spiritual

Tagged as , , , , , , , , ,

January 2, 2013 · 12:57

Was That 6 Months? Or Two Weeks?

Welcome to the Shieling these past two weeks.   But, are you sure this past two weeks didn’t really take 6 months?  We are whipped. But loved.  We felt the Spirit of Christmas here with us.   I have lots of thoughts running through my head about the coming year.  I will share later.

IMG_0234

Welcome.

Over the river and through the woods.  Or over the woods and through the river.  Or over the river wood and off  the road into a ditch.  Yeah.  That’s how it happens here.

Welcome! From Karen, Pops and gang.

Welcome! From Karen, Pops and gang.

Meet Virginia, our new St. Bernard

Meet Virginia, our new St. Bernard

..and, meet Franics, our new Great Pyrenees

..and, meet Franics, our new Great Pyrenees

Francis, meet Virginia.

Francis, meet Virginia.

Sledding

Sledding

Yippee Ti Yay, Cow Patty!!

Yippee Ti Yay, Cow Patty!!

Hot Chocolate and campfire.

Hot Chocolate and campfire.

Shootin' up some coon. uh, just kidding. Shootin' at each other.

Shootin’ up some coon.   Uh, just kidding. Shootin’ at each other.

Cross country skiing. Kinda.

Cross country skiing.   Kinda.

Beautiful, beautiful snowy evening.

Beautiful, beautiful snowy evening.

Rigorous competitions.

Rigorous competitions.

Fine Foodies

Fine Foodies

Best of all? Kids to clean up.

Best of all? Kids to clean up.

Special guests.

Special guests.

It was a super time with super people.

May God bless you and yours this new year.  I pray that you grow  in a way  that inspires others.

God bless,

Karen

3 Comments

Filed under Farm, Spiritual

Tagged as , , , , , ,

December 18, 2012 · 07:50

Where Does It all Begin? Where Does It All End?

“I don’t know if the rest of the country is struggling to understand it the same way we are here,” she said. “Life goes on, but you’re not the same. Is the rest of the country — are they going about their regular activities? Is it just another news story to them?” –Donna who works at a school nearby Sandy Hook Elementary.

“There is no pit so deep, that God’s love is not deeper still.”   –  Corrie Ten Boom

We can wake up each day determined to spread compassion, forgiveness, hope, peace, joy and love within our own small world, and inspire others to live their lives the very same way. We can become accountable. We can PRAY. – Sandi Regan

 

I quote other’s words because I have no words for what happened Friday other than, I am truly sorry for my part.  And my heart quivers for the people.

What can we do to move forward?

When tragedies happen,  the enemy celebrates victory.  The injection of fear into our hearts.  Accomplished.   We all want to cry out our fear.   We run in circles  bigger and bigger, crying out loud.  Louder and louder.   It is the guns.  It is the mental people neglect.  It is the government.  We have our fingers pointed at each other as if we are all holding a gun.    We are afraid.

Fear.

I have always heard that the opposite of fear is love.   We are incapable of loving when fear grabs a hold and causes us to draw in.   Emotions such as anger,  hopelessness,  resentment, frustration, etc.  are all symptoms of fear.  We are not getting our needs or wants met and it reduces us into a state of fear.   It causes us to withdraw into ourselves and then we cannot love.    We can ask our selves a series of questions and the fear can always be revealed.   If I do not get the outcome that I want or feel I deserve, then what becomes of me?  ME.  The cycle begins.  Love steps aside to make room for fear.   The two cannot survive in the room together.

I think I need to begin WITH  ME.   To get OUTTA  ME.

So,  that I can love.

We have different agendas based on our life experiences.  We become afraid based on the feelings those experiences evoke.   And we run on that fuel.  For our whole life,  if we allow.   Fear dictates our every move.   Our every action is determined by what has happened or not happened to us in our past and how we have internalized it.

I  don’t have to allow fear to dictate my life.  I can move fear to the basement and let love take over my soul.

I use to be fearful of many,  many things.  You name it.    I think I have  stated my fears in an old post,  so I wont go there.  It helps me to determine the fears that cause me angst.  When I feel a negative emotion, I ask myself : What about this  situation am I not getting what I want?  It does take an element of honesty here.  Lots and lots of practice.  And then:  If I should fail to  get what I want or need, what is the worst case scenario?  And then: If the worse case scenario happens, so what?   If I break the whole scenario down, I am able to get a proper perspective that will disarm my fear.  Freed up to love.   Most of our fears are about things that actually never happen.

We are experts at projecting failure, hurt, disappointment,  neglect,  catastrophe, etc on our future and the future of others.  All because of fear.

So, what does this have to do with the gun man in Connecticut?   If I am able to stop  thrashing my fears onto my neighbors,  and instead,  spread the love I have in my heart to my neighbor, we will be one baby step closer to a peace.

We all have responsibility here.

It is not just about the gun man.  It begins with my behavior toward you, my behavior about you to others and  my behavior about others to you.  We are either spreading love or fear.  The media are doing a super job spreading fear.  They clearly don’t understand the fear/love connection.

This is what we are spreading.

This is what is being spread through fear.

This is what we should be spreading around.

This is what we should be spreading around.

God removes my fear  when I pray.   He does not remove my fear when I do not.

God bless,

Karen

2 Comments

Filed under Spiritual

Tagged as , , , , , , , , , , ,

December 12, 2012 · 19:27

Sleepy Time

Isn’t it funny how we spend the first 12 years of our life fighting the urge to sleep or fighting the someone who is trying to make us sleep?  Oh my goodness,  don’t make me go to sleep, I may missssssssssss something.    Ages 13-25, love to sleep ONLY if it is on their terms and it usually doesn’t fall in line with normal working, living hours.   Then we get to ages 25-50 when we are SOOOOO tired but the 1-12’s and the 13-25’s wont let us sleep.    When we reach 50, there aint nothing stoppin’ us.  We get to sleep.  Sleep.   Sleep.  Unless your hormones are so outrageously out of whack that you lie awake all night as if you’ve  sucked down 4 cups of coffee for your nightcap.

IMG_3571 The way I see it, we were designed for sleep and it is a very important element to our well-being.  It is supposed to take up a third of our life.  It only makes sense that we should take it seriously.  We take eating seriously and it only takes up 1/8 of our time. (Supposedly.  Some take liberties there). We take work seriously.   A third of our time.

Where have we gotten the idea that sleep is a side bar in the grand scheme of things.  Whimpy people go to bed at a decent hour.   We apologize around here if we’re tired.   ????    “I’m sorry I’m so tired.  I shouldn’t be.    I have only fed every animal in the county, built a barn, and  shoveled pea gravel so far today, I don’t know why I should be so tired.  Please forgive me.”   Pops apologizes when he takes a nap once in a blue moon.  “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”  Does this make any sense to you?  We are nuts.

People, sleep is necessary.  It is imperative for good health.  And boy, I am finding out the hard way.  I lie awake all night and can hardly keep my eyes open during the day.

IMG_3573

I don’t feel like going through all the medical trauma sleep deprivation puts on our bodies, minds and souls. We have all been exhausted.  We know what it feels like.  I believe it has long-term effects.  Same as putting any other stress on our bodies.

In order for us to feel rested we are supposed to go through different cycles of sleep.  I never get to the second, third or however many there are.  Whatever cycle dreaming falls under, that is not happening.  I have read that calcium/magnesium taken at bedtime helps get a restful night sleep.  I take that and have for several years.  Ain’t workin’.  UNTIL last night I kicked it up two notches.  Guess what?  I didn’t wake up ALL NIGHT.  And you know what?  I had a super long dream taboot.  It was a nightmare, but, hey,  I’ll take what I can get.  No one got killed.  I cant wait to try it again tonight.  My bed is calling me as we speak.

IMG_3569

I love sleep.  I hope I can really sleep again someday.  It does wreak havoc on our lives and I don’t think we have a healthy respect for it.  Did you know that getting rest is one of the Ten Commandments?  For goodness sakes.  I think He is really serious about this rest thing.  I think I wanna do my part.   If I can.

Rest is spoken of many times in the Bible but the following verse is one of my all time favorite verses.  It makes me want to collapse and breath a huge sigh and smile in delight that we were designed to and for rest.  Amen,  sista.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Matthew 11:28-30

Do you just love it?  LOVE IT.

I’ve even gone as far as embroidering “sleep” verses on blankets.

IMG_3577

I will pray for sleep for you, if you pray for sleep for me.  Deal?

God bless,

Karen

2 Comments

Filed under Health/ Nutrition, Spiritual

Tagged as , , , , , , , , ,